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| 11:18pm 23/10/2004 |
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mood:  drunk
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oooo nick isnt such a bad guy. hes brightened up my day lets just hope its the truth :D |
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| 10:29pm 21/10/2004 |
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mood:  depressed music: my chemical romance - you know what they do to guys
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I feel so empty but so full all at once. My head is filled with voices all of which telling me something completely different from every other one. I wish i could just curl up in a small small ball and ignore everyone and everything. I feel used but strangely glad about it. I feel hurt and i dont know how to stop thinking about things that aint going to happen. How can one person decide whether im fit do be someone elses friend. To be honest it has nothing to do with them and i get so frustrated when people wont let me express opinion and threat me like im a little kid who doesnt understand the way the world works. I do and its fucked up. How come i can be good enough one day but the next im not worth a smile or a hug. I need someone to be there for me right now. Someone i can curl up with and trust completely. I do have people like that but i dont want to bring then down and i dont love them in the way a need to love someone. I have so many feelings built up inside of me i dont know how i can cope any more.
When is it time to throw your hands in the air and let the world know that you give up. That you dont want anything else to go wrong. You dont want to see you family being dragged kicking and screaming through one crisis and straight into the next. Is there anything you can do to make things better when you family's falling apart. I dont know what to do other than say ill be there. Even when i dont want to be there. I need a release so time away but i have nowhere to go.
It decision time as well. What do i want to do with my life. I have know idea. Im still a child in that respect i have no idea how i want to spend the next 3 or 4 or 6 or 7 years of my life. I dont even know what i want to do tomorrow let alone for the rest of my life. I know you can retrain but im so not geared up for this. Im too laid back to make decisions. Live each day as it comes and dont bother thinking about tomorrow, because tomorrow won't always come. |
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| 09:18pm 20/10/2004 |
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mood:  distressed
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its not going anywhere. Knew i shouldn't have got me hopes up but i couldn't help myself.How come i always fall for the wrong person. The one who it's not right for, or the one whose in a relationship. Apparently i'm a love sponge. O dear. |
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| 10:48pm 19/10/2004 |
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mood:  stressed
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more tears before bedtime. |
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| 10:57pm 18/10/2004 |
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mood: depressed
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RAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
GAY GAY GAY.
Not happy, im stupid, BIG FUCK UP.
Why can't i do things the way people expect.
Im so stupid n silly n open myself up to getting hurt far to easily.
Need to stop this. Don't wanna hurt anyone. Let alone myself. |
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| 09:56pm 30/09/2004 |
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mood:  confused
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I dont know what to do! Why do I fall so easily. FUCK ME thats a HUGE SPIDER |
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| 06:36pm 28/09/2004 |
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mood:  excited
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Foned me driving instructor and looked at a car today. YAY im gonna be able to drive :P
Ive been too lazy up until now **blushes** o well. |
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| 10:02pm 27/09/2004 |
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mood: lonely
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how does one feel so alone when one is surrounded by people? |
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| ponderage. |
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| 04:24pm 27/09/2004 |
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mood: guilty music: streets of philidephia
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Really quite bored for the first time in ages.
so i thought id turn over a new leaf n start using this again, for my useless garble.
Had a really nice day yesterday, everyone should see layer cake is very good film.
on the other hand code 46 is odd and a little silly, less people should see this film.
Bit confused at the minute. not sure what i want to do, or what i should be doing.
Why do i always make silly decisions. I alway wish i'd done things a different way
and then never learn from my mistakes.
Yesterday was too expensive. My purse is in pain.
This is possibly my randomist post. bit all over the place. Sorry.
Seem to be saying that a lot recently.
maybe i'm not bored enough to carry on. |
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| 05:13pm 28/04/2004 |
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You'd bite their neck and drain their blood! Why?
Because you're a vampire like me! Whats that?
You're not a vampire? Well here's your chance.
How would you Murder?
brought to you by Quizilla |
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| 05:11pm 28/04/2004 |
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Lonliness dominates you. You can hide it well, but
its there, and your friends can see it. You
constantly feel alone, and need to do things to
fill your time. Your afraid to tell people
this, but sooner or later it gets out in a bad
way, and you think you screwed up everything.
And when you are in love is when you are sad
the most. (Please Vote)
What Emotion Dominates you?
brought to you by Quizilla |
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| 07:58pm 25/01/2004 |
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Shiver me timbers you know loads about pirate
vocabulary matey so Splice the Mainbrace and
celebrate!yoho!{please vote}
pirate vocabulary
brought to you by Quizilla |
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| 07:56pm 25/01/2004 |
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Driretlan is your Vampire name.
You are a witty Vampire with a certain style that
others are drawn to.
To use your new Vampire name and become a Vampire,
go here:
www.life-blood.vze.com
What is your Vampire name?
brought to you by Quizilla |
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| 07:44pm 25/01/2004 |
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You are Form 9, Vampire: The Undying.
"And The Vampire was all that remained on
the blood drowned creation. She attempted to
regrow life from the dead. But as she was
about to give the breath of life, she was
consumed in the flame of The Phoenix and the
cycle began again."
Some examples of the Vampire Form are Hades (Greek)
and Isis (Egyptian).
The Vampire is associated with the concept of
death, the number 9, and the element of fire.
Her sign is the eclipsed moon.
As a member of Form 9, you are a very realistic
individual. You may be a little idealistic,
but you are very grounded and down to earth.
You realize that not everything lasts, but you
savor every minute of the good times. While
you may sometimes find yourself lonely, you
have strong ties with people that will never be
broken. Vampires are the best friends to have
because they are sensible.
Which Mythological Form Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla |
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| 08:07pm 10/09/2002 |
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| I Am In The Closet |
| Give it up. That overzealous teeny-bopping act isn't convincing any one. The hello kitty backpack was a dead giveaway, and we noticed you kiss your boyfriend with a closed mouth. Why did you join the cheerleading team again? Oh yeah, cos you're in the closet. |
| Take the Sexual Orientation Quiz |
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| 10:15pm 02/09/2002 |
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Todays bin a good day i think, shame the rest of the weeks gonna suk ass. ive realised quite a lot like how lucky i am to have such a wonderful bf :P and also that chris knows to much and should now die(or b bribed to stay quiet)
currently im missing the week of polly, but today i found jimmy YAY.
the only thing im luckin 4ward to tomoro is showing of my pink n black zebra pencil case.
ok u can prob tell im bored coz of the crappy post so ill shut up now
Laura xxxx
note to self: chris must be shut up |
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